Advice to a FTM from a FTM (First time Mom)

So.. in the last few weeks I have learned quite a bit. I thought I would share my nuggets of advice with other first time moms (if any read this) and if not at least record it so I remember when we have our second little one. If anyone has anything to add feel free to comment. Here is my advice:

1) When you are in the hospital have a nurse (or ideally a lactation consultant) with you the FIRST time you breastfeed your child. This will prevent you from going multiple days with your child not latching all the way on and from killing your nipples.

2) If you kill your nipples then lanolin is the way to go for healing them. Also, don't stop breastfeeding just because they are sore. For me, it lasted about a week and a half and then got mircalously better (it helped the little man learned to latch).

3) Sleep while you can in the hospital and use the nurses. They are there to help! Even if you room in you can have them look after him at night and bring him to you for feedings. I didn't have a rooming in option since Brantley was a Special Care Nursery baby, but I can tell you that sleeping in between feedings saved me. Plus - the nurses at DRH are amazing (can't attest for other hospitals).

4) Don't overpack your hospital bag. All you really need are clothes for going home and comfy pjs if you don't want to wear a hosital gown. Oh - and fuzzy socks, slippers, and chapstick. If you're nursing I recommend going to Walmart and getting a few cheap nursing tanks. They are great for the hospital and comfy at home too.

5) Take all the stuff from your hospital room that they will let you. IF you have to have a c-section make sure you take as many of the knit panties as you can! You'll find when you get home that all your undies hit right on the incesion site - the mesh panties don't and are extememly comfortable. The same with pads, ice packs, etc. You really don't need your babies diaper bag at the hospital - they supply everything. All you need to bring is his going home outfit.

6) Don't expect that first night home to be easy. Also don't expect your baby to be the same at home as in the hospital. In the hospital Brantley slept in the little bin thing and only woke up to eat, once we got him home he screamed all night the first night and we couldn't figure out why. I was a blubbering idiot the next morning and seriously was questioning my parenting skills. The truth is - you have to figure each other out. For us it was figuring out that he hates sleeping in anything where he isn't confined somewhat (so both the pack and play and crib were out), and that he wakes himself us repeatedly at night with his crazy arm movements. However, the first night we didn't know these things. The best advice - hang in there - it WILL get better.

7) Let your child sleep wherever he will sleep... the bouncer chair, the crib, the swing, the carseat, whatever it is. The most important thing is that he - and you - sleep.

8) My MUST HAVES for life with baby are as follows:

Bouncer seat
Swing
Swaddle Me blankets (oh how I love thee - Brantley has to be in full swaddle to really sleep well) Lanloin Cream
Nursing bras/tanks

9) Tip for those that are going to pump - take a sports bra (I used my oldest one) and cut small slits over the nipples. This way you can put the flanges for the pump under the sports bra and can hands free pump. Otherwise you have to hold the flanges on - and that can get annoying. Also if you hand massage your breast while you pump you'll get more milk.

10) Most babies lose weight at first. Don't let the doctor scare you if he's lost weight and it takes awhile to gain back. Brantley went from 7lbs 4oz to 6lbs 14oz. He stayed at 6lbs 14oz for two days and they were worried he wasn't gaining - but my milk hadn't come in yet. Once it did he turned into a chunky monkey and gained 7oz in 3 days. Also, babies in NICU can lose faster because most were receiving glucose water via IV - once that is stopped they generally lose. Doctors have a tendacy to scare you - don't let them.

11) Once your milk comes in your boobs will be biggers and heavier. Wearing a bra (no underwire - again I recommend Walmart) 24/7 will actually help and they will feel much better.

12) Trust your instincts. This is YOUR child. Lots of people will give you advice on how to raise him, or what to do and not to do, take it all with a grain of salt and then do what you choose. In the end you are the one that has to make the decisions and you're the one spending the time with him, so it's much more likely that you know what he needs then your aunt/friend/mother/stranger/co-worker.

13) Take lots of pictures. They grow fast (even little man is so different at almost 3 weeks!)

and lastly, 14) ENJOY your time with them. There will be moments that are so frusterating. There will be moments you want to cry. There will be moments you question if you can do this. But then he'll smile, or give you a funny face, or simply just be, and you'll look at him and your heart will swell with a love you didn't know was possible. It's unreal how much you'll want to protect this little one from everything. So enjoy the little days and give lots and lots of hugs, kisses and cuddles.